Member Musings: Iris Shur

Member Musings features the reflections and thoughts of an NPC member

Yes, We Do Have Seasons—Maybe Not The Ones You’re Used To

Iris Shur

Iris Shur    

“We have seasons here in Naples. Yes we do. Perhaps not summer/fall/winter/spring. Our January to after Easter season is “OMG, can you believe the traffic?” season, fondly known as CYBTT.

It is the season to be cursing as you try bravely to get from point A to point B in a reasonable time without losing your temper or having someone give you the finger. This is also the season when we full-timers frequent McDonald’s, although I tell out-of-towners that even McDonald’s requires a reservation.

Another great perk, although maybe the only perk, is that we get to wear clothes that have languished in our drawers the rest of the year—tops with long sleeves, sweaters, even cowboy boots if we have them.

Another really nifty bonus is that our hairdos stay relatively in place without the excessive humidity of that other season, INTHITH–translated for you foreigners as, “It’s not the heat it’s the humidity.”

It is a mantra around here that older women with flabby arms do not wear sleeveless tops. Do not! Balderdash, I say. INTHITH is so invasive that I can’t bear to wear any clothing at all, but going with that style choice would be an affront to the other Neapolitans and, I guess, illegal. I wear as little as possible without crossing the line, flabby arms be damned.

But, unlike CYBTT (“Can you believe the traffic?” for those of you with short memories) there is very little traffic. My personal best for traveling the 9 miles to downtown is 12 minutes vs 45 minutes to an hour at the height of INTHITH (again—”It’s not the heat it’s the humidity”).

When I visit up north the conversation invariably comes around to “How can you live in Florida in the summer—it’s so humid. I counter with “How can you live here in the winter, it’s so cold and, to boot, there’s snow.”

Then I invite them to come and visit me in July.